The March 8th appointment went well. We heard the baby's heartbeat for the first time and it was good at 160 beats/minute. We both cried. I had been having severe nausea for a couple of days (even threw up on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday) and so, when we went in on Monday, we had been optimistic for perhaps the first time in this pregnancy.
But by March 10th, things got worse. The spotting had increased significantly. On March 11th, it turned to bright red again. We called the RE and set up another ulrasound for March 12th. They heard the heartbeat again - 180 this time. This was yesterday. Since the bright red bleeding, I have had no nausea or throwing up. Nothing on Friday or Saturday. I am already fearing the worst. We have a pre-natal appointment scheduled on the 18th and there is nothing I can do till then.
This is the worst thing about infertility. I am always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I cannot enjoy this pregnancy out of fear. I analyze each symptom and lack of symptoms kills me. I just want to spend my time in the bathroom throwing up. I spend my time researching pregnancies without symptoms. I will take this emotional roller-coaster for the next 9 months if that is what it takes. But I at least want to know that everything turns out for the best. Unfortunately, there is no way to know that at 7 weeks and 5 days.
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I know it's hard to trust that everything will be ok. Just try to enjoy this pregnancy a LITTLE bit, ok:)? Like I've told you before, I know MANY women who have spotted through their entire pregnancies, and have wonderful, healthy babies! Good luck on your upcoming appt this week! I'll keep my fingers crossed that everything goes wonderfully for you! Grow, baby, grow!!!
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